Jason and I being in charge of a blog is much like turning it over to Shawn Spencer and Burton Controlaltdlete Guster, you never know what you're going to get... or when. If ever. Recently viewed, but not at the top of the "N.U.K.I.E." spectrum are the celluloid catastrophes, "DEF-CON 4," "Gymkata," "Miami Connection," and "Ultimate Prey." We will force our little grey cells to recall the horror of their viewing; although some delightful moments were had during "Gymkata" and "Miami Connection," we'll touch on them later. "DEF-CON 4" started out like a send-up to "Waiting for Godot," three NORAD atsronauts manning a defensive space station (forever...) during the height of the Cold War; but, none of them has the guts to push the button when the time comes. After what seemed like a "cinematic eternity," (months according to the script) other actors actually appear in the film. A group of survivalist punks force the defense satellite to reland on Earth in a much less visitor friendly, eastern Canada. The polite and civil veneer of the Canadian people is torn away in a post-apocalyptic world of disease and want. How a group of semi-psychotic and partially disease-ridden punks is able to reprogram and comandeer a NORAD defense station while holed up in a fort made entirely of junk, and why the space station looks nothing like the cover art, is never really explained. And, on that point, why does the cover feature a semi-buried skeletal astronaut, complete with NASA suit and helmet, none of which appear on the actors, when the film takes place in the Canadian North Woods? Not many sand dunes there, we suppose.
     Next on the traumatic agenda: "Ultimate Prey," featuring Ben Maccabee (aka, Benjamin Kobby), and what we supposed was intended to pass as a cast "ringer," Joe Estevez (yes, THAT Estevez, Uncle of Emilio). You may remember Uncle Joe from cinematic classics, such as, "Beach Babes From Beyond," "San Franpsycho," "The Attack of the 30-foot Chola," and "Axe Giant: The Wrath of Paul Bunyan." Trust us, it only gets worse from here... When we first began Terrible Tuesdays we didn't realize there was actually an entire "Rich-Guys-Pay-To-Hunt-Other-People" genre. Oh, yes, there is: "Escape 2000" (5.4 NUKIES), "Hard Target" (w/ J.C.VanDamme, 4.7 NUKIES), "Death Ring" (5.0 NUKIES) and "Surviving the Game" (TBA), plus numerous others. We digress... Back to "Ultimate Prey." Which featured nothing truly "ultimate," although you better "prey" you never see it. A former Special Forces soldier, now construction worker, slaves away at the grindstone to pay the bills, only to come home to a nagging wife who complains they never see each other. He's laid-off of his job, through a conspiracy between the constuction site foreman and a shady man who lives on a yacht (Estevez). To try to stay on top of the bills he accepts an offer to participate in a special government program, which turns out to be "the game." Enter the rich guys, of various hunting and stalking styles, who intend to bring down their human quarry. But, little do they know that Jon Brant is a former special forces soldier who won't go down so easily.
     Next time... up close with "Gymkata," "Miami Connection," and "Death Ring."